Wednesday, 21 August 2013

Caravan hell

I was my friend and work colleague Fran and my wife in a caravan. No idea where we were but it was one of those big long static ones reminiscent of 1970's family holidays. 
Fran and my wife were getting ready for a fancy dress party and insisted that I put on a pink frilly party dress. Despite my protests I found myself sitting looking out of the caravan window in a girls party dress. 

On the lawn outside I could see a wicker basket which was turning in circles on its own. 
As I looked closer and the opening to the basket came into view, I saw a huge tuna fish wriggling inside it. I ran outside and pushed the basket under the caravan where there was water and the tuna swam off. 

Back inside the caravan I went into the very small bathroom and knocked a bottle of shampoo off of the sink with the hem of my dress as I turned around. 
The neck of the bottle broke off and shampoo, which was green, covered the floor. 
I tried to pick it up with my hands but I was just getting into a mess. 

Finally I was in a swimming pool, minus the pink dress and I'd taken the skin from a crocodile and placed it over an inflatable bed. The crocodile skin was yellow and green and fitted perfectly. 
I then attempted to sit on the bed as it floated in the pool but fell off.  

09 10