Thursday, 24 January 2013

Hello Dave!

Clarification is required if I was dreaming the first part as, I woke, or didn't, with my wife walking on me with icy cold feet. She has previous for this.

To start with I was with my good friend Lee-Ann at work and we were walking around in the sunshine. Suddenly and for no reason Lee-Ann ignored me and walked away from me.
All attempts to speak with her were met with her giving me the cold shoulder.
Upset by this I walked to my mums house and found Lee-Ann outside the house.
She then started talking to me as if nothing had happened?

Next I was again walking, but this time alone, or so I thought. I was aware that I was being followed and noticed it was Papa Lazarou from the sketch from League of Gentlemen.
I headed towards the railway station with him still in pursuit, calling out, "Hello Dave".
When I reached the station I found BBC radio DJ, David 'diddy' Hamilton who asked me what was wrong. When I tried to point out Papa Lazarou to David, he had vanished.

Lastly I was in my old house with two women and a man who were all Polish. I was going to convert my house to become multi occupancy to make lots of money.
In the room were four plant pots, three had cannabis plants in and the other contained a can of Special Brew lager.
I watered the plants as the leaves were dying and poured water over the can of beer. We all started to howl with laughter at this as if it was the funniest thing we'd ever seen.

I then went into the kitchen where there were two canaries in a cage. I made myself a peanut butter sandwich, as I was about to eat it, two teenage girls entered the room.
Both Polish, one said, "This is my friend Rose". Rose then picked up my sandwich and started to eat it.
Enraged by this I threw them out into the street promptly followed by the other three from the other room. The accommodation was cancelled, no one messes with my peanut butter sandwich!

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