Thursday, 23 February 2012

Stoned Red Indian & blooded hands

Lately my head is whirl of activity every night. If I was awake and as busy I'd be suffering from exhaustion.

For the initial part of my slumber I spent it chasing a purple dog ball across a frozen pond. Unable to pick it up with my teeth because it just slid across the ice as I tried to bite it. I wasn't a dog so could have just picked up by hand but instead spent hours pursuing it to no avail.

I go to my mums house to find she has been replaced with a native American Indian. Not only that, the Indian is completely stoned, smoking cannabis from a large pipe.

Next I find myself as global superstar actor George Clooney, happy with that. I'm abseiling down a building past a huge clock, one hand on the rope and the other gripping my female co star. No idea who she was but glamourous and sexy as you'd expect no less for George.
We are escaping the bad guys and making our way to the flat of our getaway driver who is actor Scott Malson, formerly of The Bill but now in Eastenders.
Upon us attending the flat, Scott isn't there but his little brother is who informs us that Scott is way out of his acting league overwhelmed by my aura and won't be helping us.
Oh well, his flat was nice.

I'm next with my wife attending an autopsy. We are gloved up and in face masks and gowns watching the pathologist perform the procedure.
I get under the sheet with the body and feel the cold legs of the deceased on my body whilst my wife watches intently at the body being cut open. The body is that of a female with long black hair, the smell from her is horrible.
I get out from under the sheet to find my hands are covered in blood as are my wife's. We both proceed to wash our hands in the kitchen sink.

I awoke at this point and after a sip of fruit juice, ( Berries & Cherries), I drifted back off to the scene of a French barn which I was attempting to buy from Graham the security guard at the Boots store in Peterborough city centre.
Graham apart from dealing with all matters security related in Boots is also a very shrewd business man as he wasn't letting the barn go for less than £34,000.
To the best of my knowledge Graham is from Essex despite his poor attempt at a French accent.
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