Thursday, 23 October 2014

Ginger cats unite.

I started off by being in a huge boat, a boat so big I looked like a tiny dot on it. It was an ordinary vessel but just of gigantic poportions. The reason I had taken refuse on this massive ship, to prevent being caught and eaten by King Kong. 

I hadn't seen the oversized ape but knew he was after me and so I hid on the boat and sailed away, hoping this would save me. 

Next I'm in my car and see a woman broken down at the side of the road. It was dark and very late and so I offered her some help. She was of course a little unsure of me and initially refused my offer of a lift. I got out and opened my boot. 

As I assured the woman I wasn't a serial killer, I loaded a clothes airer into my car. I then noticed that on the front passenger seat was my ginger cat called Bear. Bear is a house cat and never leaves the confines of our home. I was a little alarmed to see him, and even more frantic when he jumped out and ran towards some trees. 

I chased him and found that he was sat with serveral other ginger cats. He was happy to find others of his kind. I scooped him up and popped him back in the car. The woman and her car had vanished. 

  

Wednesday, 22 October 2014

Goat in the pig house

I began last night by visiting a house with my wife and two very old women. I didn't know the old ladies or the female that answered the door. She stated that she wasn't ready for visitors and asked us to wait outside. 

Whilst waiting what seemed a very long time, I got bored and looked up at the house to see a huge metal extractor fan ductwork raising up and over the roof. I decided that it wasn't fixed securely and set about climbing to the top of the house. 

Whilst fixing the ductwork to the roof I looked down and saw that my wife and the two elderly women had also got bored and they were weeding the garden. 
Looking into the rear garden I saw our guinea pigs house, which is actually a chicken coop. Inside of it was a goat. 

I was lastly at work sat behind a desk. Two supervisors came in and asked what I was doing sat in the bosses chair and that I should get out before I got into trouble. I smiled, turned my name badge around on the table to face them and looked at their shocked expressions. 

I was the boss! 

 

Tuesday, 21 October 2014

Giant cuddles

Last night I was in a huge field with the biggest dog I'd ever seen in my life. It looked like a Great Dane but was the size of a horse. I can clearly see reality and dreams mixing here, as I have a horse and a dog. 

The dog was very cuddly and laid down to mussel into me. Even laying on its side, it was still taller than me. I rubbed it head and it cuddled in for ages. It was very relaxing. 

Lastly I was loading the boot of my new car with plastic coat hangers. I piled them in until the boot was full and then carefully closed it shut. As I did this the right hand rear tyre started to hiss. 

I bent down and saw a plastic hanger sticking out from the inside of the tyre and air gushing out. Within seconds the tyre was completely flat and I just looked at it with a feeling of sadness and helplessness. 

 

Monday, 20 October 2014

Laughing Sean

I had driven my horse in a luxury transportation box up into the Crumbrian mountains. The box had accommodation and was a top of the range model. I pulled up outside a farmhouse and wondered why there was no parking. I left the box in the road blocking half of the carriageway. 

I let down the rear shutter that became a ramp for my horse to walk down. As it lowered, I talked to my horse, telling him he was having a holiday. The scenery was spectacular and as I led my horse out, he looked happy and content. 

I was then inside the farmhouse with my horse, standing in the kitchen diner. A woman that I didn't know welcomed us both and hugged me. Sat on the sofa was Sean, a supervisor from work. Sean was laughing a big hearty belly laugh, it was contagious and I joined in. 

I noticed another woman that I again didn't know sat on another sofa. She too started laughing and the four of us just laughed loudly for no apparent reason. 

 

Sunday, 19 October 2014

I love music

I love music, any kind of music
I love music, just as long as it's groovin'

Makes me laugh, makes me smile
All the while
Whenever I'm with you girl
While we dance, make romance
I'm enchanted by the things that you do

The O'Jays 1975 hit is all I have in my head today. 

 

Saturday, 18 October 2014

Old Betsy

I had taken my new car into a garage to have it checked over, it sat shiny and clean. Next to it was my old car, which apart from a few spots of rust was looking good. I glanced at it in fond admiration. 

One of my colleagues that I initially joined my job with arrived. Mark approached me as simply said, "Can I have your old car? I want to resort it to its former Gorly. 

I hugged Mark and cried, "Thank you, I love that old car". 
Let's be clear, I was fond of old Betsy, but I cried about it. 



 

 

Friday, 17 October 2014

Boy band & dead chicken

The setting was my place of work and I was sat at briefing waiting to start my day. With me was my good friend Matt, who hadn't been in for ages and he was getting some stick from everyone else because of this. 

Then in walked Kallum who also hadn't been in for ages. I shouted, "Here's boy band!" Mainly because of his styled hair that never moves. Everyone in the room cheered and clapped. The supervisor told Kallum he was working with Phill and his face dropped. He promptly turned around and went home. 

Next I was running over towards what looked like a dead body in the street. When I got there it was in fact, pieces of cooked chicken in a red sause. I scooped them up and ran inside to a dark warehouse. 
I found a sink and started to wash off the sause under the tap. 

Lastly I was back in work and went to collect my bag from the shelving where everyone stores it. I started to shout and swear as mine had been moved from its usual stop. I then began to throw other people's bags around the room in my rage. 

 

Thursday, 16 October 2014

Lay you down, on a bed of vegetables

I was attempting to plant a flower into an extremely long and thin pot but I couldn't find any soil. My wife was watching me do this and very uncharacteristic of her she began shouting at me that I was doing it wrong and had no idea what I was doing. 

Haven't genuinely never had a cross word with my wife in all the time I have known her, this upset me and I was in shock at her behaviour. Thankfully it was only a dream. 

Lastly, still with my wife, she was laying on top of a huge pike of soil. I climbed up to see her and as I did so, plants started to pop up out of the soil. There were courgettes, carrots and beetroots, all growing at a very fast rate. 

My wife looked over at me and simply said, "It's getting towards winter now, please stop growing vegetables". 

  

Wednesday, 15 October 2014

Keeper of the keys

Walking along the sea front with my wife, we discover a bunch of keys half buried in the sand. My wife picked them up and decided it was now our mission to locate the owner and reunite them with their lost keys. 

I hailed a yellow taxi which appeared to be normal until it stopped and was the size of a double decker bus. We sat inside and immediately fell down the back of the leather seat and vanished. 

I was lastly in the loft of my Nan's old house. It was dark and I needed the toilet. I climbed down the ladder onto the landing and the house was in darkness. After using the toilet I decided to sleep in the spare room which was empty. 

I woke up feeling totally fresh and saw my nan on the landing. I told her how well I had slept and she said it's because that was the room I was born in. Which it actually was. 

 

Tuesday, 14 October 2014

Holy island

A extremely brief image from last night as I slept the sleep of champions. All I can recall is looking at a small island away in the distant sea. 

It had a very holy feel about it but I had nothing to base this on other than a feeling of calm and tranquility. 

I have awoken somewhat refreshed today however. 

 

Monday, 13 October 2014

Inflatable Davina McCall

I began by opening large barrels. They were plastic and had tape around the lids which I was peeling off to get to the contents. Once inside them, I discovered animals curled up at the bottom of the barrels. They were like nothing I had ever seen before. 

Some were lizard type creatures and others resembled small dinosaurs. With every lid I opened, a greatful animal would wake up and scrurry away to freedom. 
The last one that I opened was totally filled with something and spilled out when I flipped the lid. 

It looked like a mass of plastic liquid and when it had emptied from the barrel, it be game to inflate like a balloon. I watched as the thing blew up with air and towered about twenty feet above me. 

When it stopped and was fully inflated, I could then see what it was. It was a giant Davina McCall, complete with beautiful wavy hair. I stood and stared in wonder.    

 

Sunday, 12 October 2014

Keeping up with the James's

The setting was an country cottage set in the grounds of an old school. I was living there with my wife and it was late at night. There had been some high winds and I was aware that trees had fallen down within the grounds. 

We both set off into the darkness to check the damage and check that everyone was ok. We met an elderly woman who I assumed was the head mistress. 

She handed me a list of pupils still in the school and asked me to check they were ok. On the list was four names. I decided to wait until morning as there were just the four to check. 

When morning light came I discovered that on the back of the piece of paper were hundreds of other names. The head mistress immediately sacked us. 

Standing in the cottage with the sunlight through the windows our replacements arrived. It was Lee Ann and Andy and they were looking very smug about it. Lee Ann pointed at the windows and said how dirty they were. 
I was furious. 



 
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